Lilly is insane. Those of you who know her know this. Adorable and sweet, but quite insane.
First, a disclaimer. I have to watch my mouth. It's bad when husband is away. I get stressed, I swear a lot. Oops. So this exchange takes place.
I was on the phone with my best friend Beth and as I'm talking Lilly walks past me and knocks her shins right into the coffee table and proclaims "Ow, Dammit!" and walks on. I'm on the phone so it takes me a few seconds to process this. After my delay I ask her "What did you just say?" "I said 'ow, dammit' mommy" as if to say are you hard of hearing? I told her I'd slap her mouth next time she said it, but I had to say that with a straight face. It was funny. She says "yes, ma'am" and walks on. The ma'am thing isn't something I taught her, by the way. She started doing that all on her own. Probably because I tell her to say "yes, mommy" and because she's obstinate that's her way of rebelling.
Next, today was Lilly's birthday. Sort of. Tomorrow is her birthday but we're celebrating today. Anyway our friends got her little gifts. One of these was a strawberry shortcake lip gloss set. I knew this would be a mess, but I knew she'd love it. On our way home from the beach I let her have it. I was unaware of the nail polish contained in this set. I got the chance to yell from the front seat "Lilly! Don't eat the nail polish!" Seriously. Why should I have to say this out loud. Nail polish doesn't even smell yummy, it smells awful. She's four now. Why? I made her sister take them from her since I couldn't reach, but before that she "painted" her toes. And her hand. And her face. Nice one Lilly.
I guess the bright side is she didn't paint the car. Definatly a bright side.
I hate to complain. I do, really. Don't give me that look! But being a part time single mom of three is freaking exhausting. I don't know how my friends with jobs do this, but maybe it's easier with a job because someone else gets to watch the little energy vampires for awhile. Like yesterday, for example. I'm feeding the baby his morning cereal and I lick some off my hand. Aaaand that's a booger. Of course it is. There is something seriously wrong with my day when accidentally ingesting a booger not only doesn't surprise me, but doesn't gross me out as much as it should.
I think back to when it was just one kid and shake my head. I was an idiot to complain back then. Think chasing a 3 year old is exhausting? Now do it with a baby attached to your hip and simultaneously getting your 6 year old to stay on track with her homework. Think it's hard to get up with a baby during the night? Now do that a few times a night and get up at 6am for school. Oh, and you can't go to bed until midnight because you have shit to do when the kids go to bed at 8. Like eating dinner uninterrupted or showering or quietly doing the dishes when a baby isn't adamant about climbing in the dishwasher or emailing the hubby or paying bills. You get the idea. Think going to the store is a challenge? Try it with three children on the cart while the 3 year old sees something shiny over there and the 6 year old inquires about the possibility of toys. "No you can't have this, you can't have that. You ask again I'll get you with a wiffle ball bat" I'll sing insanely as I walk through the store. Sometimes I forget people can hear me when I'm out in public.
So occasionally I'll lament at how easy I had it with one and sit on my pity pot, but then I remember how wonderful I have it. My six year old with her compassion and mother hen personality. She's always trying to make her sister and brother happy. My three year old with her wild imagination and big personality. I don't think I'll forget when she renamed her stuffed kitty, Wishy, to Fenga Fanga and when I asked what happened to Wishy her only reply was "Wishy got hurt" Uh-huh. Think I'll sleep with the doors locked if you don't mind sweetie. And my baby. Oh, I am going to miss his sweet baby head when he gets bigger. As much as he keeps me up at night, I do love to snuggle his cute little butt.
I guess my point is I could whine and complain about how challenging and exhausting this is, but at the end of the day I couldn't be happier. Smelly, maybe, but happy.
Before I dive right into this next bit I have to preface it. I have a good friend from our last duty station who now lives around our new duty station. We don't get to spend that much time together anymore because she lives *just* out of reach at about an hour away. At any rate, they are now moving away and she wanted to get together one last time and go get the kids out to have some fun for spring break.
Orlando.
Holy crap, what have I gotten myself into? Five days at the Nickelodeon Suites. My kids were amped, her kid was amped, my baby was off schedule and so was everyone else. Recipe for insanity complete. A hotel full of screaming hordes of children. It was nice to do something nice and fun for the kids. Every day every couple of hours right outside our room "Are you all ready for slime!" "YEAH!" and this little show would go on for fifteen minutes or so. Kids were mostly too excited to sleep through all that excitement. No nap + lots and lots of stimulation = mommy must not kill. mommy must remember this is for you. mommy loves you. must not have "Here's Johnny!" moment.
We did attempt to go to the outlet mall and do some shopping for us. This went just fine for about an hour. After that, are you ready for drop and flop time! Her five year old and my three year old were at each other's throats and my six year old with the momma hen complex was ready to write them both off, to be polite. I think I left that place with a twitch.
Next day, thunderstorm and tornado warnings all day! Vacation! Yay! But that did give us a day in the room of not hearing screaming hordes of children ready for slime and frolicking about in the pool. We had a poolside room. Six floors up, but still poolside. And loud.
Fun thing we did do is we did the character breakfast for the kids. Pricey, but worth it. Food was decent, but the kid's faces when they met Aang and Dora and Squidward and Spongebob and Patrick. You could tell that it meant a lot to them.
The kids loved the pool and my six year old's favorite part was the daily mass sliming. She was so happy. My three year old had lots of fun wandering into the zero depth entry water which is it's designed like a beach, so I could sit at the shallow end with the baby. They all loved it, which is what I keep reminding myself. The kids. They had so much fun. So much. Fun. Please ignore that twitch I get as I say that.
I have to thank my friend for inviting me along on her trip through temporary insanity no matter how twitchy it made me. Next time, not without the husband.
